// lost destiny, far outcry

[croibhristeoir]

Who: Lancer, Shadow Lancer [open]
Where: The streets of Prospero.
When: The Dark Hour, November 25
Summary: Know how to get rid of Shadows. Fight it anyway.
Rating: PG-13, idk.
Log:
[He knew exactly what this was.]

[Ever since his death in the Holy Grail War, Diarmuid had been aware of a crushing and terrible darkness in his heart. It was awful, knowing he had failed again. And being aware of his guilt as a knight who could not serve his lord while simultaneously understanding that his Master had been a terrible person...that alone would have been painful. Added on to the fact that his lord had again betrayed him and led him to his death? It was enough to send a lesser man into utter despair.]

[So of course Diarmuid had come to understand what this Shadow was. That dark, hateful, spite-filled corner of his heart had manifested after so many months.]

[That was why it didn't--wouldn't attack anyone but him.]

[Because in the dark, despairing part of his heart, the one Diarmuid truly disliked was himself. He blamed himself for failing Kayneth, labeled himself a spineless coward for allowing his Master to cut down his pride to nothing, and despised himself for the lingering anger he felt even now. It was foolish, he knew that. Those thoughts weren't worth having--a knight should have pride in himself, and Diarmuid had plenty of that.]

[So he had denied and forced back the anger and hatred towards everyone including himself. He denied that the mere idea of speaking to Fionn again terrified him. Diarmuid rejected and denied the resentment he had died screaming to the world, because it was unfitting for a Knight of Fianna.]

[And now it had come to this.]

Cu Chulainn.

[He spoke his Persona's name in barely a whisper; beside the knight in black and green appeared one in pure white. That reinforcement at his side was a reassurance; even if he looked nothing like the knight Diarmuid so idolized, their presences felt similar in a way he couldn't place. More of a reassurance was the Sukukaja his Persona cast before disappearing; Lancer would need every bit of agility he could get for this.]

One lance? [Materializing from the shadows cast by the nearest building, the suit-wearing double laughed mockingly.] How ironic. It is a shame precious Arturia will not fight as my left hand as I did so eagerly for her. But then again, I do not deserve such a high honor. How can I possibly ask such a kind and chivalrous knight to risk shedding her blood for me?

Silence. [Diarmuid's voice was steady and calm; he knew what he had to do. But it wasn't easy. He couldn't just say 'I'm angry at the world and that's fine'.] This...is something I must do on my own. I know that now.

[No. He had frustrations to take out on the thoughts that had so plagued him.]

[Diarmuid raised the lance held in his still-working left hand, eyes focused sharply on his Shadow. In response, his double held out both hands and summoned Gae Dearg and Gae Buidhe.]

Whether you hold the strength of a Servant or not, it will be a human who defeats you. Remember that, and die along with these cruel and false thoughts of mine.

You are not me.

Comments

[unknownrival.livejournal.com]

Diarmuid. Diarmuid, you're a moron.

[There was no way Issei wouldn't have kept a close eye on the comings and goings of those in the hotel. And Diarmuid was in no state to go out alone.

Issei glared at Diarmuid's back as he approached, his sword close at his side.]

[croibhristeoir]

I know what I'm doing, Issei.

That'd be a first.

[unknownrival.livejournal.com]

Maybe it's something you have to do, but you can't do it on your own.

[croibhristeoir]

...I must ask you to stay out of this fight for the moment. Trust me.

Why should anyone trust me?

[unknownrival.livejournal.com]

If I must. If I see that you're in more danger than I can stand, I may act to protect you.

[croibhristeoir]

It's going to be alright. Listen carefully--the golden lance causes wounds that can not be healed. The crimson one cancels and cuts through prana. I suspect it will do the same to a Persona. If you get involved...be careful.

[Lancer's Shadow didn't seem to want to waste any more time. He darted at the original with a bloodthirsty grin and lashed out with the yellow lance in his hand. Unflinching and refusing to back down even an inch, Diarmuid raised his own to parry it. Before his Shadow could strike with the second one, the former Servant attacked with his own and landed a glancing blow to the Shadow's side.]

[unknownrival.livejournal.com]

[There was nothing Issei could really do but watch and wait and worry over every single attack. But he had given a promise to trust his friend.]

place holderrrrr

[revivedpianist.livejournal.com]

[OH HECKS NAH BRO -- NOT THIS TIME

Neah thinks he's sneaking up behind the shadow. Except for the fact it's obvious that he just hit Diarmuid in the head with his shotgun.]

Surfaced again, have you?!

asdfghgfds dying here

[croibhristeoir]

Wh--?! [WHACK]

[GODDAMMIT, BRO, THAT HURT--ooooh pretty stars.]

HE'S OVER THERE, DAMMIT!

I HAD TO

[revivedpianist.livejournal.com]

[... You know that derp face that one would normally have after doing something incredibly stupid? Well, this was the moment. If only for a quick moment before he removes the gun from Diarmuid's back.

UM.]

My apologies... I cannot see at night, and you two look far too alike...

EXCELLENT

[croibhristeoir]

It's fine, forget it.

[OW GOD PAIN.]

It doesn't matter. Even if a friend should cause me pain, what right do I have to be angry? Least of all when I have done so much worse.

[revivedpianist.livejournal.com]

You shadows talk far too much. Perhaps you should lend me one of your lungs.

[Neah was fairly calm. He didn't like seeing a shadow, but he was prepared, or somewhat prepared.] Let's put an end to you, shall we?

[croibhristeoir]

Right. I owe him something of a fight after our last encounter.

Very well. Cu Chulainn.

[Whoops. Enjoy that lightning, Neah.]

[athngabla.livejournal.com]

You called?

[It wasn't the Cu Chulainn that Diarmuid had intentionally summoned that spoke. Rather, it the one who'd been busying himself during the dark hours, picking up the slack for those who were less fortunate than he and were forced to combat their own, personal Shadows. He might have been keeping an eye on his comrade, he might have been just been passing through. Either way, here he was, standing relaxed nearby.]

[croibhristeoir]

Wh-what--?

Oh...I had not expected to see you here. What have I done to deserve such an honor?

[athngabla.livejournal.com]

[He looks to the shadow and jerks his thumb towards the original, smiling lazily.]

I can't say I planned it out like this, but you fight with two lances, don't you?

[croibhristeoir]

That's not an option right now, unfortunately.

[athngabla.livejournal.com]

What, you've got one right there, and there's one here.

[He raises his own spear and taps the butt of it against the ground once before casually moving into a more battle ready stance.]

[croibhristeoir]

You flatter me, but I can't--

I can't ask you to fight for me. I am so unworthy of such a thing.

[ex_cashcow493]

Diarmuid!!

[ Ever get the feeling that something bad is about to happen, Lancer? Especially whenever it's Saber bringing her sword up against your lance instead of the shadow's?

The lack of magic resist just made this encounter a hell of a lot more fun. ]

[croibhristeoir]

Wh...Arturia, what are you doing?!

[ex_cashcow493]

Leave from this place. I shall handle the other!

[croibhristeoir]

But--you can't, I--don't. Don't do this, please don't betray me.

Ah, Arturia...I do not deserve you at my side.

[ex_cashcow493]

Diarmuid, the other you will not bring any harm to those around us as long as I am with him. [ Addressing the injured one, of course. ] So please let us be.

[ Then she'll turn towards Shadow Lancer with a small smile on her face. ]

May we spend what remains of this hour together, please?

[croibhristeoir]

But--

[...No. She wasn't. That wasn't possible--no, of course it was possible. But he didn't want it to be true.]

If only I could, my dearest knight. But unfortunately, it seems you've broken the heart of the man who's broken so many himself.

[Lancer could barely even speak. He stared at Saber in wide-eyed shock, silently praying he was wrong. That she wasn't affected by that of all things.]

N-...Arturia, please, I beg of you to regain your senses...