I just can't look its killing me & taking control; (CLOSED)

[ex_cashcow493]

WHO: caliburns and croibhristeoir
WHAT: Lack of magic resistance
WHEN: November 17 - Dark Hour
WHERE: Bookstore
RATING: PG-13 for now.

[ The night before was a failure. She left Diarmuid by himself to chase after his shadow, but was left with nothing but guilt for abandoning him. Tonight though she was prepared all while keeping an eye out for any of the other potential Shadows she had been told about.

Perhaps it was stupid of her to be out on her own, but she cared not. Sitting alone in the bookstore, lights turned off, she waits for the clock to strike midnight. She may have dozed off sometime before then though. ]

Comments

[croibhristeoir]

[Shortly after the Dark Hour struck, Lancer's Shadow could of course be found in the bookstore--he only really had two objectives. Find Arturia. Kill his other self, before he could hurt her. No one could ever bring his precious shining knight to harm, not without severe consequence.]

Arturia...are you sleeping here? Hardly a suitable place, for someone like you.

[ex_cashcow493]

Is that you, Diarmuid?

[ So naive in her exhaustion as she forces herself to sit up, raising tiny fists to rub at her eyes. Even if she's in the dark, she had to rid of the sleep that overtook them. ]

You should not be out this late. The Dark Hour approaches and if you are caught in your condition..

[croibhristeoir]

My condition?

[Might want to listen for that freaky echo to his voice, Saber. Also look, glowing eyes.]

I am in the best condition I have been in since my arrival to this world.

[ex_cashcow493]

[ Once her hands move away, she recognizes the glow and boy is she quick to get on her feet. ]

You! [ The man who's face she's seen in her mind all day. ] Do you make it a habit to confront your defeat so quickly?

[croibhristeoir]

You wish to kill me? Why? [There was a sincerely pleading tone to his voice, devoid of the usual mocking sarcasm.]

Have I not been your loyal knight? If you order me to die, I will die. You need not waste your energy raising a blade to me.

[ex_cashcow493]

[ That was unexpected and enough to make her falter back a couple steps. No.. she sought him out with the intent of protecting Diarmuid, so if all she has to do is order it.. ]

Then you have my--!! [ Cutting herself off by gritting her teeth, Saber's at a loss for words. ]

[croibhristeoir]

[A crimson lance appeared in the Shadow's hand, the point directed at his own heart.]

I did it once, didn't I? Dying by another's command is nothing new--and if it was your command I would follow without question.

[ex_cashcow493]

[ Impulse took over and it's with that her hands go to grab at that lance. One she can never forget as her fingers wrap around and instead of entertaining the idea of breaking it (she has to break the yellow one!) she instead tries to pull it from his chest. ]

Stop with this! I cannot allow you to act so stupid! [ He's not real. He's not real. ] Cease with such ignorant behavior and behave as you should!

[croibhristeoir]

[He allowed her to take it without resistance, smiling serenely.]

I don't know what you mean, Arturia.

[ex_cashcow493]

[ Squeezing onto the lance, she just stands there close towards him. ]

I.. I do not know what I mean either. [ Frustration holds a commanding reign over her tone. ] I cannot stop thinking about..

[croibhristeoir]

Oh...oh, you've lost your resistance, haven't you?

[ex_cashcow493]

My resistance?

[croibhristeoir]

Your magic resistance, Saber.

Surely you remember just what it was that truly made me famous. What caused me to run across Ireland for a year and a half with what should have been another man's wife.

I'm cursed. And now you've fallen to it just as so many others have.

[ex_cashcow493]

No.. that is impossible. I am in love with..

[ Shirou.

Shirou.

Shirou.

Shirou.

She's in love with Shirou Emiya.

But his father--no, no, no. It did not matter!

"This is Saber, my most important person in the world." Didn't he love her? Why couldn't he call her by her true name like Diarmuid would? Why was she even entertaining all of this? ]

It is impossible. I cannot fall to such sorcery!

[croibhristeoir]

Ah...it truly is a shame. I thought you were different. You were one of the only women to look at me and see a knight rather than a target for their affections. Even here, I allowed myself to believe I would never have to be seen that way again--it's painful, breaking so many hearts over one lifetime.

I've never heard 'I love you' spoken completely of a woman's free will. I'm sure that not even Grainne was unaffected, but I didn't care. I fled with her for my precious pride, anything to make her smile. Anything so I wouldn't have to see Fionn's beloved cry.

But now...now it's just all the same again. I let myself care for you, and now this curse has reduced you to such a level. It's not fair, not to either of us.

[ex_cashcow493]

[ He was right, wasn't he? No, certainly when she said she loved him, it wasn't due to that mark.

... but a geas is a powerful thing. It shouldn't come as a surprise that she's been under it's effect the entire time. She suspected it before, but this only confirms it. ]

I.. I have let you down, have I not?

[croibhristeoir]

No. I am the one who would have let you down.

I am in love with you, Arturia. Again, I fall in love with a woman whose heart should belong to another. Would you have run away with me, had I been the one to ask...? No, surely not. Granting you my love would be improper as a married knight, much less granting it to one such as yourself who I am so unworthy of.

I dare call us 'equals'...how could I, when I am so worthless next to the beautiful and resplendent King of Knights? When I am so cruel next to the kindness of Arturia Pendragon?

[ex_cashcow493]

[ 'This is just an illusion.' Something like this should be easily ignored or in the slightest, feigned ignorance over the worlds he was saying. A proclamation of love unto her? No, it couldn't be real.

Her knight couldn't be in love with her. Diarmuid Ua Duibhne was in love with his wife, the mother of his five children, and people don't fall in love with someone else after that.

Oh but how her mind entertained the thought. Everything about Shirou pales in comparison to a knight like Diarmuid. ]

No, this cannot be. Knights simply do not fall in love with other knights! [ Diarmuid couldn't.. return her affections now that she's stuck under this stupid curse. ] We are equals.. That is why we swore ourselves to each other, right?

[croibhristeoir]

What right do I have to be equal to you? I've fallen in love with someone I shouldn't have. I would have fled with you as I did with Grainne if only you asked.

I truly am deplorable.

[ex_cashcow493]

No, this is not real. [ God damn does it hurt to resist the idea. ] You are just an illusion who will fade away within the hour.

[croibhristeoir]

I'm entirely real, Arturia. I am Diarmuid Ua Duibhne.

[ex_cashcow493]

No, no you are not. You are just like the other shadows that show up during this time.

[croibhristeoir]

'Unforgivable. I’ll never forgive you.'

[He spoke calmly, a small smirk on his face.]

'You dead men who are slaved by fame and desecrated the glory of knights... let my blood stain that dream.'

[As he continued, an odd sort of reverence crept into his voice; that almost of one quoting poetry.]

'I curse the Holy Grail. I curse that your wishes will become disasters.'

Now tell me, Arturia...how would I know of the anger I at last displayed on that day if I was not who I tell you I am?

[ex_cashcow493]

Diarmuid.. cease with this.

[ The only thing more disturbing than hearing those words again in that tone was the fact she just wanted to hold him. ]

Please.

[croibhristeoir]

Anything you ask of me will be done, Arturia.